Friday 22 February 2013

Masochism - MITAH

A post in which I exclaim why I am both insane and a potential genius.

As you may or may not know depending or not if you're me, I started an animation project a while back on my Youtube channel called 'The Man in the Ant Hill', which I envisioned as a series of animated shorts based on the 1960's comic story of the same name (The origin story of Marvel's Ant-Man if you're interested). My plan of action for this idea of mine was to animate the various stages, record my progress and then stick it onto Youtube, in practice so that potential employers will take note of my initiative and masochism.

Why masochism you ask? Well, a masochist is defined as somebody who feels some kind of weird gratification from being punished, and I think the fact that I chose to use the animation method I find the most difficult is definitely masochistic. Namely that doing frame by frame animation on a graphics tablet is about an exact a science as doing a life drawing with an icicle onto some bedrock. And never planning on letting up shows that I seem to derive some kind of glee in deliberately punishing myself.

Now, what I COULD have done when writing up this project was to, say perhaps, animate using a pre-existing rig of some kind or create one at my own pace. Things which, while comfortable with using, am definitely no Richard Williams at just quite yet, but instead I chose the method where I have to draw each individual frame in the long continuous sequence with no breaks because there are no camera alterations (Fun fact, the average drawing time of one frame is 10 minutes).

My original reason for punishing myself so was because I was using the 'Original series Goku from Dragonball' endurance test method of practicing at something. That is to say, rather than building up skill and endurance with steadily escalating smaller challenges, instead master the hardest method first and becoming virtually godlike in the easier methods because nothing feels quite so sweet after the back breaking pain that is trying frame by frame animation with little skill.

I would just give up, except I know that my punishingly low level of self esteem demands that I get just this one victory out of the way before settling for lesser victories, which ironically makes me more confident in myself and determined to work, which is always a plus. 

Clarification: In the original series of Dragonball, Goku exercises
with a several ton turtle shell on his back for six months and becomes
virtually unstoppable with his prodigious strength despite
having no formal martial arts training. The origin of my awfully phrased
metaphor.